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Hello


I'm the Coquette. I talk shit for a living. It's a pleasure to meet you.

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Hello


I'm the Coquette. I talk shit for a living. It's a pleasure to meet you.

"Wait, so you're an anonymous internet personality? What the fuck's that about?"

I have no idea. I've been doing this shit for half a damn decade, and I honestly couldn't tell you how any of it happened. None of it was planned. It was a joke that turned into a hobby that turned into a second career.

I started out blogging about my drug fueled Hollywood escapades, and I eventually found myself writing professionally. I love this shit. I really do.

Currently, I write culture, style, and advice columns for publications ranging from Nerve to Playboy, and my first book, "Notes To My Future Husband," is available in stores now.

If you wanna talk business, feel free to hit me up. Writers gotta write.

"Who are you?"

Like I said, I'm the Coquette.

People wearing ties have called me "one of the internet's most irreverent personalities with a reputation for scathingly intelligent pop culture commentary," which is nice of them, but really, I'm just an anonymous party girl who managed to turn being a smart ass into a regular gig.

"No, really. Who are you?"

No, really. I'm not telling. It doesn't matter who I am anyway.

I have a whole other buttoned-up professional life where nobody knows about all this crazy shit I do on the side. Hell, for a while I even designed collections of handbags and jewelry. Still, first and foremost, I am a writer.

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My Blogs


Pop culture critique and shady advice. Let's not take any of this seriously, shall we?

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My Blogs


Pop culture critique and shady advice. Let's not take any of this seriously, shall we?

 

The Coquette

The Coquette is my personal blog, the original shit show I started on a blurry-eyed whim back 2009, and known for a time simply as "Coke Talk."

I post pop-culture ephemera, damn good music, and the occasional rant about my roller-coaster of a love life. Sometimes I try and elevate the discourse on important social and political issues. Sometimes I just feel like bitching about the latest celebrity trainwreck. I pay attention to whatever bubbles up out of the zeitgeist, and no topic is too high or too low.

Dear Coquette

Readers of my personal blog started asking me questions, so I started answering them. It didn't take long for me to spin off a separate blog just for advice, and pretty soon I was fielding thousands of letters every month on everything from wardrobe malfunctions to existential crisis management.

Time Magazine included Dear Coquette in their list of "30 Must See Tumblr Blogs," and The Huffington Post called Dear Coquette one of the "23 Funniest Tumblrs That Will Make You LOL."

Over the years, I've earned a reputation as one of the internet's most subversive advice columnists with a brutally honest and unfiltered voice.

Coquette Style

I started my style blog to coincide with the limited release of my handbag and jewelry collections, and it was all quite a bit of fun. Unfortunately, there are only so many hours in the day, so I don't post as much as I used to.

Still, when it had my full attention, Fashionista listed Coquette Style as one of the "10 Best Tumblrs By Fashion Industry Insiders," and I was one of the original bloggers flown out by Tumblr to cover New York Fashion Week.

 
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Selected Writings and Press


I still can't believe people pay me for this.

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Selected Writings and Press


I still can't believe people pay me for this.

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My First Book


I wrote a silly little paperback, a blog-to-book amuse-bouche. Enjoy!

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My First Book


I wrote a silly little paperback, a blog-to-book amuse-bouche. Enjoy!

Notes To My Future Husband

Call ‘em vows. Call ‘em expectations. Call ‘em whatever you’d like, but when it comes to her future husband, what single lady couldn’t fill a whole book?

Based on the wildly popular blog, Notes To My Future Husband is a smirking nod to all the tid-bits and minutia about the men in our lives that make us swoon and then roll our eyes. 

Order it from Amazon or Barnes and Noble today!

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My Collections


Classy-as-fuck handbags. Cooler-than-fuck jewelry.

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My Collections


Classy-as-fuck handbags. Cooler-than-fuck jewelry.

Coquette Handbags

Coquette Jewelry

* My handbag and jewelry collections were limited runs and are no longer available in stores. Sorry, kids.

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My Playlists


Good tunes for good times.

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My Playlists


Good tunes for good times.

Coquette Mix December 2014

Coquette Mix December 2014

Coquette Mix November 2014

Coquette Mix November 2014

Coquette Mix October 2014

Coquette Mix October 2014

Coquette Mix September 2014

Coquette Mix September 2014

The Ultimate Hate Fuck Mix

The Ultimate Hate Fuck Mix

August Can Go Fuck Itself

August Can Go Fuck Itself

 
A Tape To Remember 1988

A Tape To Remember 1988

Coquette Mix August 2014

Coquette Mix August 2014

Baptized In Dirty Water

Baptized In Dirty Water

Coquette Mix July 2014

Coquette Mix July 2014

Musical Xanax

Musical Xanax

Fancy Hotel Fuck Music

Fancy Hotel Fuck Music

 
Songs For A Broken Heart

Songs For A Broken Heart

Classic Pool Party Tunes

Classic Pool Party Tunes

Coquette Mix June 2014

Coquette Mix June 2014

Songs That Remind Me Of Exes

Songs That Remind Me Of Exes

Ecstasy Makes You Fall In Love With Silly Things

Ecstasy Makes You Fall In Love With Silly Things

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Contact Me


Talk some shit. Confess your sins. Make me an offer.

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Contact Me


Talk some shit. Confess your sins. Make me an offer.

Name *
Name

* If you'd like to make an anonymous submission to my advice column, the best place for that is still over at Dear Coquette. Thanks!